Ex-Boyfriend Strikes Again

After a period of three weeks in which Ex-Boyfriend repeatedly declared his honorable intentions, both freaking me out and making me happy (then freaking me out because who the hell is he to make me happy), I ended things ONCE AND FOR ALL last Saturday. By ONCE AND FOR ALL I mean that I woke up in his apartment and realized I didn't really want to be dating him again because he is

a) insane
b) evil
c) getting fat

I tried to gear up for an "I mean it this time, we are so over, seriously, no really, for real" type conversation, but felt exhausted and so snuck out the front door at 7am.

I was sad when I thought it was really over. Then Tuesday he began with a text message, soon escalated to multiple calls a night, and finally left a voice message that, though the words were normal enough ("Hi, it's me, blah blah blah") was inexplicably delivered in a cross between a British accent and the "Hi and welcome to Moviefone" voice.

Now I am thinking that maybe I miss him because he is

a) insane
b) interestingly moral-free
c) not fat yet

Also, in a city like New York, it is incredibly rare to find someone who is not playing the "I've totally been to that restaurant and it sucked" game. I went out for drinks last night with two of my guy friends and I found myself unable to participate in three quarters of the conversation because when I actually had been to that restaurant, it hadn't sucked.

The posturings of insecure nice guys who are earning a salary barely above mine (which begs the question--how in God's name are they affording these trendy little hot spot restaurants?) and think it's cool to dislike everything weaken my Ex-Boyfriend resolve. This is not to say that Ex-Boyfriend isn't snotty in his own right, being, as he is, completely obsessed with money and how much smarter he is than other people. But somehow this seems, on the whole, less pretentious than finding it necessary to fake displeasure with everything, out of fear of being caught liking something uncool.