Recently, Re-Boyfriend has been working ridiculously late hours. This is not a problem since I actually like having time to myself to go to the gym. Or sit on my ass watching reality television and thinking about the gym. Whichever.
The problem is that when I see him he’s all “My job!” and then “MY JOB.” And sometimes, “my job my job my job MY JOB.”
My response always falls into one of two categories. An example of the first would be, “I had a big day too. Me and Office Slacker rated departments according to attractiveness and publicity won. But only by a point.” An example of the second is “You’ll be fine. You are SO smart. Wow.”
Sometimes, he lifts out of his funk due to the charming nature of my comments. Most of the time he does not, because my comments aren’t that charming.
If this were S., I would get her drunk and we would eat fries while debating whether or not her boss is having an affair. Then she would feel better and I would feel like I had helped.
Re-Boyfriend drinks as a matter of course, I have yet to discover a food he truly loves (other than hard-boiled eggs, which seem like a dubious comfort food at best) and I don't think he really cares whether or not his boss is having an affair.
Food, drinks and gossip being the trifecta of my standard brand of comfort, I can be of no help in this situation.
This makes me sad because I miss fun Re-Boyfriend. And also because of unselfish reasons that I am sure I have deep down inside.
Thursday
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15 comments:
Offer sex to take his mind off of his stressful day... works everytime.
You should be there in the pink T-shirt, when he gets home. He might be more fun then.
You should plan a weekend away. SOmewhere there is no boss, maybe a fun park. Maybe he just needs to relive something from child hood. If that doesn't work...I recommend kidnapping him from work on one of the nights he works late and go see Rocky Horror.
Laughing at all the "actors" might help.
My ex boyfriend used to arrive round and say he was knackered and would I mind if he had a sleep on the sofa while dinner was cooking...........translate while you are cooking dinner! Mmmmmm interesting concept, I found that cooking said meal butt naked kept his attention, although not for long which is why he is my ex. I've always found a well timed vase of flowers that arrived mysteriously today ensures their undivided attention..if you know what I mean. Although that might explan why I am single. Crap, I don't know what to suggest?
Rachh
Okay, I hate to have to do this, but...
1) Happy, sexy, funfunfun
2) Oh my god I'm so in love!
3) Wow - his feet stink. I should move in so I can do his laundry.
4) Ummm, so I'm just the maid now? One that puts out?
5) Hooray, we're pregnant/getting married!
6) Our kids, our trips, our stuff...
7) What happened to sex?
8) Yawn, who are you again?
9) Why did I ever think this was a good idea?
10a) Don't let the doorknob...
10b) I love you just the way you are...
The cycle may be completed without one or two of these steps, but this is the general trajectory.
You know, I never know what to say to the boys I date when they're all stress, stress, stress, my job, my job, my job...I think just the listening helps. Sex, too, obviously. I sometimes offer up stories from my day, but I think I mostly feel inadequate because I tend to think that their jobs are so much more important than my job, which is kinda not true but really is. Maybe I should stop dating lawyers and find myself a fry cook or something like that...
I've met my internet twin! Haha.
Anyway, women are much easier to comfort than men. Although men enjoy being babied (just what it sounds like -- lay his head against your chest, and run your fingers through his hair... whispering soothing things into his ear), you really can't do anything except give him the controller to the PS2 and let him kill something on the screen for an hour... meh.
Women, on the other hand, want things. Comfort food, comfort blanket, comfort movie, cuddle... or on the other end of the scale -- we want you to get away from us and to just shut the hell up.
Lol.
I think you should invent your own excitement of the day to bring up when self-centered, lingerie-dictating, picture-requesting-but-not-posting RBF comes home. I suggest a reattack on the meatball market and see if some crazy dillingeresque shoot out erupts. That would make his job job job whining seem like so much well, whining.
just my $0.02
CB
Now dear,we all know you have a brain,and,we all know you have a heart. What you need to develop is an empathetic dialogue. When reexbf arrives, turn off the TV, give him a kiss and say"how was your day today sweetheart" and then actually listen and look at him while he talks even if it is boring and banal. Then kiss him again and say " what a big strong reexbf you are, did they really make you do "X" " and then listen again . Then say " Is there anything I can do ?" and then listen and do what ever he asks you to do. Some times. in order to come out ahead, you have to put the other person first.
There IS a fun side to ReBoyfriend?
Food drinks and gossip...good times. Good fuckin' times
I think you listening helps a lot. Maybe getting different colored versions of the pink tee would help more. Well, it'd likely perk him up. :-)
Start taking care of yourself; if he wants mothering, he has one. It is not your responcibility to take care of him. My reponce would be different if this guy was on the team and at the plate, but it sounds like he is in the stands whining because his teams behind, the beer is warm, and his nutts are not salty.
I don´t have a job....
By the time I get to 15th in line, I can only say I agree with Jessica and Grant Miller.
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