Valentine's Day
Last night I received my Valentine’s gift of black thermal long underwear. It came in two tins—one for the pants and one for the long sleeve shirt. Both items were emblazoned with the logo “Hot Chillys.”
They matched Re-Boyfriend’s thermals perfectly, items that he wears throughout winter so that he can swagger around in a suit, seemingly impervious to the cold. (This makes for some interesting morning get-ups, such as the time he went to get a glass of water wearing black leggings and a button down and I realized he was dressed exactly like Lindsay Lohan.)
As I unfurled the bottoms, Re-Boyfriend’s eyes widened.
“Yours have a stirrup foot? I want those! That’s so awesome.”
You seriously cannot make this up.
“Now we can be warm together,” he told me.
“And run around like ninjas in the morning,” I answered, deadpan.
“Exactly.” He beamed.
To be fair, he also got me a very cute hat and it has been totally freezing in New York of late. Flowers wilt but thermals last forever. But I’m still going to lie if anyone at work asks me what I got for Valentine’s Day.
27 comments:
Oh. My. God.
Hillarious.
I have been waiting for the Valentine's Day gift post forever.
SO FUNNY. I love Re-Boyfriend's absurd gifts... (and I still think it's ok to lie to anyone who asks what you got)
Seriously, that is one of the best ideas for a gift ever!
that is CUTE!
It's such a stupid holiday! But what a fantastic gift. The Lindsay Lohan comment was priceless.
Aw, he seems so pleased. Precious, in a kind of weird way...
You guys are super cute. It seems like he loves you so much!! Happy valentines day :)
Y'know, secretly Re-Boyfriend wants the two of you to be one of those Matching Couples, where you golf together in matching polos, or go to alma mater football games in matching logo-emblazoned sweatshirts, or go to cocktail parties in matching Versace (O.K., that last one isn't too bad, is it?). ;-)
Wow CB I'm so full of envy. I wish I had a man that gave me underwear that makes me look like a ninja.
What did you give to him.
That is so fabulous!
I got a homemade chicken fried steak dinner - waaay more worth the calories than chocolate.
I want Hot Chillyz...
There's nothing more romantic than matching long-underwear.
Lol, Re-Boyfriend is so adorable. I think that's a cool gift.
If people ask what you got for V-day, you can wiggle your eyebrows suggestively and say, "The gift is underneath my clothes."
Now that's love!
Hi my name is Me. and I am a blog-a-holic...
*officially addicted*
And in this weather- every girl needs a pair of thermals! Keep warm!
Uhoh....I'm now scared to move in with my boyfriend.....what if we then become one of those "twinky" couples.... The matching outfits is one step closer to a level of committment that I'm just not ready for....
Now that you both have black thermal outfits, maybe you can mime in Central Park? Just a thought... and it beats having to photocopy!
Hot Chillys are a necessity up here! Unfortunately I don't have a boyfriend to buy them for me so I wear $5 Old Navy leggings and pretend they keep me warm.
lol yeah I would definitely lie too.
I received a bottle of wine and a cookbook. I think he thought he could get me drunk and get me to cook. HA... notsomuch.
(he does 90% of the cooking)
I say... give me 2 bottles of wine and I will watch HIM cook. Yes, now that would be a fine vday....
Forget flowers and thermals... if you really want to express love, gift a potato!
I mean think about it... flowers only last a few weeks, and they're only really gifted because they're pretty... that's like saying "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"... and they die if you don't water them...
But a potato... they last for fucking ever...I mean not only will they not rot, they'll actually start growing shit on them even if you leave them alone... that's like saying "my love for you grows"... not just that, you can do so much with a potato.. you can even make a battery with it... that says "I have so many ways to show my love for you"... and most importantly, potatoes might be ugly, but they're still so great... that's telling your other half "look, it doesn't matter what you look like, I'll still love you"
So next valentine's day, gift a potato, and see what it turns into by 2009
My x-bf was the same way. Is ReBF by any chance German? They're all about the practical gifts. Which in my mind defeats the purpose of gift, namely, something decadent and wonderful that you wouldn't buy for yourself.
Awwwwwwww. Matching Ninjas. Bless.
Warms the heart and the Arse!
I didn't lie to anyone last year when I got a bundle of string cheese tied together with a red ribbon. It's a long story, but it was the perfect valentine's day gift. I waved it proudly to everyone who was brave enough to ask "so, what did not-boyfriend get YOU for Valentine's Day?".
Even now, I swell with pride at the thought of it.
You're just hilarious! Followed some links to this and it has made my day. Definitely.
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